Unexpected life events can impact your life at any time; it could be a job loss, the death of a loved one, an accident, or even the onset of illness. Various types of events can derail your journey in life, especially natural disasters that clearly show us how disruptive life can get. How we cope with all these unexpected life events will determine the outcome that we hope for. I was hospitalized; I was so sick that I had a high fever, nausea, chills, convulsions, and uncontrollable bladder. My dad took me to the ER, where lab tests were done and the doctors informed me I had an infection. Consequently, I was admitted to the hospital,  where 24 hours later the infectious disease doctors informed me that I had a bacterial infection called Bacteremia.  The doctors put me on a cocktail of antibiotics to treat the infection aggressively. After 10 days of intensive antibiotics treatment, my body weakened so much it caused Debility; doctors transferred me to the rehabilitation section of the hospital to help me gain strength from my overall weakness. 

We live in a world where a perfect physical appearance is a depiction of acceptable standards of beauty. Looks matter more than character and inner beauty, and the media showcases acceptable appearances that society should follow. I do believe that appropriate acceptable appearances do matter, especially for work, school, and special occasions. These days society has taken extreme measures to look a certain way, to live beyond their means, and display pseudo behaviors only to pretend. There are even those who go into debt to fulfill a certain lifestyle, or simply live a life under a false persona. While in the real world, the reality is far from that, people are living in poverty, trying their best every day to fulfill their basic needs. There are parts of our world where appearances are not a priority since most people can not live a lifestyle that some parts of today's society are accustomed to. Of course, they wish for a better life; understandably, life is not fair. Yet somehow, they are happy and content with their lives. When compared to those who have everything in life, they are still happy or satisfied with what they have. Unhappiness that is brought about by living above your means and causes more harm than just living a simple lifestyle. Stressing about how you look? What clothing do you wear? What car you should drive? And how big my house should be? Causes more harm to your well-being and overall sanity than anything else, when compared to those who are just happy with what they have and how they live.

When you take the time to reflect and evaluate your memories, it enables you to develop a better understanding and appreciation for what you have learned. Memories span across time. Cherished memories are found in spontaneous laughter, adventures, and when precious time is spent with those you love. We all have beautiful precious memories that we cherish. When we reminisce, our hearts are full of joy from the moments of love, celebration, and happiness. Memories take us back in time, providing moments of reflection and wonderment. It can be traumatizing for some people who have memories filled with unhappiness. Everyone may not experience cherished memories, some people may have experienced abuse, obstacles, challenges, and hardships that some of us may not even understand or relate to. Memories allow us to reflect on our past, and look back on our individual histories.  Regardless of our memories, they are just a moment in time. We don't have to drown ourselves in bad memories nor should we forget them all together. A reflection of our past is an opportunity to evaluate the experience and decide on what we want for the future.

We seldom realize the consequences of bad behavior until it spirals out of control. We must acknowledge that there is a strong cultural and environmental influence on behavior. Both good and bad behavioral traits are often learned over time. Good behavioral traits come from a strong cultural influence of family and friends. According to my mentor Dr. Donald Nichols, the power of socialization is that society will always teach and reinforce the norms that produce the behavior that is desired by society. There are rules within society that determine behavior, and there are varying degrees of punishment that are allocated or dished out as needed to expect adherence to the conforms of certain behaviors. Therefore failure to conform to behavioral norms among cultures can lead to people being hit, punished, or in some instances extremes of shame, being shunned and or even made an outcast. The ultimate goal of behavioral adjustment and change, or simply an attitude adjustment is teaching good behavior. Whereby rules can be reinforced by an appropriate discipline through guidance and direction. Disciplining bad behavior in children has changed over time, and so has the tolerance for certain behaviors. Either we have become soft as a society, or we are simply not bothered by the shenanigans.

The ability to encourage others can make a difference in your life as well as the life of the person you are helping. My mentor Dr. Donald Nichols always reminds me that I have the gift of encouragement. At first, I did not think much of it, I only realized that when I saw how my encouragement made an impact on others. Encouragement instills hope, optimism, and upliftment when someone needs it the most. Whether you encourage an adult or child, it helps in their growth and development as an individual. Your compassion for people gives you the ability to encourage and help them be hopeful, which in turn gives them the motivation to keep trying and not give up on themselves. it is imperative that we encourage people who may coping with challenging times in their life, since we all need hope. Hope never dies, unless you or someone else creates its demise. Think about that for a second, and consider if you need encouragement and hope at a certain moment in life and someone is there to fulfill that. It would be a blessing if someone was there to encourage you when you needed it the most.

Education is vital to mankind's success, regardless of what career path or education someone undertakes. Whether you choose an academic or vocational education, what is important is that you are truly happy and you can earn a living from your eventual career. Understandably not everyone is academically inclined, so we need individuals skilled in the trade fields more than ever. In some instances, people with a trade skill earn more than someone with a degree. All that matters is that you earn a living that is comfortable for you and your family. It is important to make sure you work hard, with sheer dedication and the faith to believe in yourselves. You can accomplish anything when you set your mind and focus on it. Keep in mind, it is very important to choose your friends wisely and don't let anyone discourage you, unless it is for the right reasons, like when it pertains to your well-being and safety. Make sure you are a positive influence on them, and them on you. If you have goals and dreams, pursue them. Never underestimate yourself.  Your possibilities are endless. Just don't wait for the opportunity to come to you, get out there. Make it happen for yourself and you will have no regrets.

Humor is often used as entertainment for all. We all love funny movies, boisterous comedians, and at times even the family clown. Some might not know the true significance of humor, as it pertains to the psychological impact it has on individuals.  Most important humor is a psychological defense mechanism.  It can benefit an individual tremendously when used appropriately. On the other hand, it can often hide an underlying problem a person is experiencing.  I would like to focus on how humor has benefitted me over the years while I coped with living with chronic illness and disability. Humor has helped me so much,  especially enabling me to accept my prognosis and continue living my life the best way I can. I developed my philosophy to life, "If life sucks, deal with it. If shit happens, clean it up." I did not let the seriousness of my illness consume me. I must admit that my antics came at the expense of my parents. I rather make jokes, than wallow about my episodic declines in my health. I have learned to cope and live with chronic illness for more than 20 years now, even though it does not get any easier for me. You take it day by day and find the humor when you can and can.

Our values and beliefs are often rooted in our culture and tradition, including from our environment and education. It no doubt evolves, to enable us to be the person we want to be, and sometimes whom we never expect to become. I believe that you should never underestimate the importance of culture or tradition, since it is rooted in our history of human existence. Over generations, we are often instilled with the beliefs and values that we portray to the world. Over the years as our growth and development enhance, our values and beliefs will too. Traditional values and customs may seem silly to most, although their significance has deep meaning to many cultures. The importance of family is integral and vital in defining strength within a family system. Family values and beliefs are much stronger when maintained and sustained over generations.

Everyone faces change at some point in their lives. While some may accept change with ease, others may find it difficult to cope with change. Considering how change can impact all aspects of one's life, there are both negative and positive effects of it. Change can be brought about by trauma, addiction, illness, a job, financial issues, marriage, friendship, a new relationship, etc. The effects of change can be measured by how it impacts your life and those around you. A positive change is a beneficial component of life, and it can help an individual sustain a profound sense of well-being. Willingness to change can indicate the person's ability to make amends, work hard in achieving their goals, and even make the necessary course corrections in life. Well, one must want such a change or may need a change in the trajectory of the journey they take in life.

We all experience doubt sometimes, and doubt can lead to making a mistake or not taking on an opportunity. Every one of us can do amazing things in life. Discouragement can lead to doubting oneself, especially when it comes from those closest to you. Often the lack of motivation creates self-doubt, where you are likely not willing to take initiative to achieve your goals. Even if you fail, don't give up and try again, until you can and will succeed. Doubt will question your actions and intentions, and if it pertains to your well-being and safety, then trust your intuition and instincts. Never hesitate to do what is right, since it helps sustain a righteous path in life. Your wishes and dreams may not materialize immediately, it takes time and effort to achieve them. Remember, doubt can derail your journey, so why give in to that? It is ok to question your actions and postulate the directions you take in life. Sometimes a certain level of doubt can be helpful, then again always trust your guarded judgment. 

When did you last have a meaningful, constructive conversation with a total stranger? In our lifetime, we meet people from all levels of society, but I must admit, there are some we wish we never met. Nonetheless, those whom we took the time to have a meaningful conversation with, will turn out to be mutually beneficial. We learn so much from meaningful constructive conversations, and a free exchange of knowledge, wisdom, and thoughts. Striking up a conversation with a stranger can surprise you. Honestly, you don't know the day they are having or they don’t know the day you are having, and a simple conversation can uplift you both. Especially speaking to older people, since you can gain so much wisdom and guidance from them, and I must admit some young people as well. I am fortunate to have met many interesting people over the years, and I encourage you all to try the simple joy of communication.

Many aspects of chronic illness impede the well-being of a patient's life, and sometimes when they are overwhelmed it can lead to depression. However, the impact that chronic illness may have on a patient's life can vary depending on the severity of their illness. Although most chronic illnesses are not immediately fatal, the symptoms can linger for years, and over time the implications placed upon an individual can be devastating. Sometimes we may think we are weak, and we unintentionally create hurdles in our minds that prevent us from moving forward or place limitations upon ourselves. Chronic illness can force many stressful lifestyle changes and may also create feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness. Individuals must learn to adapt to live with their illness, as they fight to cope, manage, or even to have a chance at recovery. Nothing in life is easy, especially when you are fighting an ongoing illness that challenges you every single day.